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You might think that I am CRAZY! (Family Law)

Thu, 17 Aug 2000 01:31:00 GMT

My husband starts school in the fall and he will have his own apartment in California until I move out there in April. My stepdaughter her mother and her other sister are moving to California also. They are moving from a different state but she has a good job out here and her husband can't come out till December. She found a place to live but it was in the worst part of town and she wants to move into a studio with her and her two children (one being my step-daughter). That is all she can afford with just moving out here this area they live in is a high rent district. So I convinced my husband to let her stay with him and pay half the rent until she can save up money to afford better living conditions. This is where my questions begin. My husband currently pays child support but he doesn't pay childcare cost because that wasn't an issue at the time. Now with her moving in with him is he still required to pay child support? She is asking about him paying half the daycare expenses. If he does have to pay daycare can he request that she sends her to a licensed daycare so that we can write it off on our taxes. Can they decided these conditions by themselves or does it have to go to court. They never went to court to determine this child support it went through the DA's office. She has closed the case through the DA's office because they would hold her child support for three months before giving it to her. So would we have to reopen the case through the DA or would we have to file with the Family court? Thanks for any help you can give me!

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  • Fri, 18 Aug 2000 11:04:00 GMT(1)
  • All my family and friend have that same opinion, that I am CRAZY. I really do trust my husband they are ex's for a reason. He caught her in bed with another man while she was pregnant with his daughter. My husband has no respect for her and we are doing this because he doesn't want anything to happen to her. The mother will not let her live with my husband full time because then she will lose all control and support payment. (she is verrrry greeedy!) Well that enough pouring my heart out but I can understand your post totally!
  • Thu, 17 Aug 2000 09:03:00 GMT(2)
  • If your fiance is ordered to pay child support, he will have to do so even if they are living with him. He will need to work something out with her to get it reimbursed back to him. Like he pays it and she turns around and writes him a check for the amount. If he doesn't pay, regardless if she agrees, he can get in trouble down the road. Better safe than sorry. Now, are you SURE you are alright with that set up? I know I wouldn't be, regardless if they have a child together. Think this one through thoroughly, I wouldn't want someone getting hurt in the process of *this* situation. Good luck!
  • Fri, 18 Aug 2000 18:29:00 GMT(3)
  • quote:
    Originally posted by Onegoodstepmom:
    [b]All my family and friend have that same opinion, that I am CRAZY. I really do trust my husband they are ex's for a reason. He caught her in bed with another man while she was pregnant with his daughter. My husband has no respect for her and we are doing this because he doesn't want anything to happen to her. The mother will not let her live with my husband full time because then she will lose all control and support payment. (she is verrrry greeedy!) Well that enough pouring my heart out but I can understand your post totally![/b]

    As long as you completely trust your husband, that is all that matters! I apologize if I came across kind of rude. After reading your original post, I just want to look out for YOU! I know what you mean about ex's being ex's for a reason! My husband has a very sneaky ex wife and she would try just about anything, if given the chance. I trust my husband, but I wouldn't put anything past her! Good luck always
  • Fri, 18 Aug 2000 10:26:00 GMT(4)
  • I hope you trust your husband with all your heart and soul. Can you trust the ex wife? Sounds like you might be setting yourself up for something here. sorry, just my opinion.
  • Fri, 18 Aug 2000 02:25:00 GMT(5)
  • He should go to court and ask for a modification due to the fact that he is now providing a home for his child. He will have to do it in the original state that holds jurisdication. Reductions can not be done retroactively so he needs to do it now. If she agrees to it, (which she should since he is providing that support), it shouldn't count much, just the cost of having the paperwork done. I really believe that he will kick himself later if he doesn't do this.
  • Fri, 18 Aug 2000 14:49:00 GMT(6)
  • quote:
    Originally posted by Onegoodstepmom:
    [b]All my family and friend have that same opinion, that I am CRAZY. I really do trust my husband they are ex's for a reason. He caught her in bed with another man while she was pregnant with his daughter. My husband has no respect for her and we are doing this because he doesn't want anything to happen to her. The mother will not let her live with my husband full time because then she will lose all control and support payment. (she is verrrry greeedy!) Well that enough pouring my heart out but I can understand your post totally![/b]

    In which case the moment he suggests going to court to reduce CS payments, she will be out of there.. Read through this board at how many situations are changed the moment is threatened with losing CS money.
    MySonsMom gave the best advice.. Have him pay her the normal CS payments and then for her to pay rent back & utilities etc.. That way there is no threat to reduce the amount, but she is paying for normal living expenses.
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