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Coin Toss (Family Law)

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• Mon, 22 Oct 2007 10:04:00 GMT(1)
• They don't get to decide where they live. Once the judge makes a decision, (which I hope will be in your favor), the girls will need counseling. If they move with you, change their school, but allow them to see their friends on the weekends.
• Mon, 22 Oct 2007 10:57:00 GMT(2)
• Thanks for all who have replied.
  I do have the girls in therapy. Actually my 12 year old has been with a therapist for almost a year now. The "care team" is a group of individuals from diffrent agencies that get together to interview a child that has been abused like this. They only interview the child one time and one time only.
  As far as taking the child to the hospital under advisment of both my arrorney and CYS no I have not but depending on the outcome of the interview they will do that this week.
  Thank you again.
• Mon, 22 Oct 2007 11:42:00 GMT(3)

• Quote:

  Originally Posted by Ohiogal

  Why in God's name did they tell you NOT to take the child to the hospital?

  Your guess is as good as mine....
• Mon, 22 Oct 2007 13:12:00 GMT(4)
• Quote:

  Originally Posted by baystategirlThis thread is just sad...11 and 12 year old girls that value themselves so little and parents that are clueless...

  It's going around.... clueless parents and little girls w/no self-esteem, that is... it's damned near an epidemic.
• Mon, 22 Oct 2007 12:17:00 GMT(5)

• Quote:

  Originally Posted by CJane

  I'm curious about something...
  Is your daughter doing these things VOLUNTARILY?
  Are they being done in MOM'S HOUSE?
  Is she exhibiting OTHER sexually inappropriate behaviors?
  Has she been MOLESTED or is she ACTING OUT sexually?
  I realize she's only 11 and therefore cannot 'give' consent... but in a lot of areas and with a lot of kids, BJ's are the 'new French Kissing'. That is NOT to downplay this issue, but you're not giving 1/2 the information required and you don't really seem all that concerned about the ACT - only whether or not you retain custody.

  
  You have some very good questions.
  She said that she kind of wants to do these things.. that its like she wants to do it but then she doesnt feel right about it.
  She was never molested as far as I know but there may have been a sitation back when she was 4 that was investigated with an ex boyfriend but nothing was ever found ... she was taken to the hospital then and nothing was found.
  The situation with the 16 year old was at a new years eve party last year. Here mom according to my daughters was passed out in another room drunk when the boy approached her.
  This new situation. Was done at the guys house. My daughter left a party for a friend and was went to this guys house. They had a concersation and was goofing around and then he ask her ....
• Mon, 22 Oct 2007 10:15:00 GMT(6)
• What action was taken the first time this child made allegations of sexual abuse?
  Has the child been open w/the counselor even with her mother present at the sessions you've attended?
  Who is this 'care team' with? I don't find a reference to them in PA... only TX.
  How did you handle the allegations this time? Did you call child protective services? The police? Your attorney? Mom?
• Mon, 22 Oct 2007 10:15:00 GMT(7)
• Get the girls in counseling immediately. Did you take them to the hospital and have them checked out? Were they tested for STDs? If not DO SO NOW! The ONLY 'positive' about oral sex is neither could be pregnant. And that is a very ironic sarcastic positive. These CHILDREN have major problems -- not the least of which is a mother who is blind to the problems these actions can cause, have caused and what they relate to.
• Mon, 22 Oct 2007 11:33:00 GMT(8)

• Quote:

  Originally Posted by CJane

  What action was taken the first time this child made allegations of sexual abuse?
  Has the child been open w/the counselor even with her mother present at the sessions you've attended?
  Who is this 'care team' with? I don't find a reference to them in PA... only TX.
  How did you handle the allegations this time? Did you call child protective services? The police? Your attorney? Mom?

  The child ask that mom not be contacted because she said she was afriad that she would be beaten up. CYS was involved and my daughter actually told me and her councler.
  The councler told CYS and the girls went back to there mom. They had a meeting very simular to the one that we are going to have comming up and my daughter told everything that happened. But she didnt want to get the kid in trouble. this was her moms best friends nephew and because the the boy who did this was a minor we were told nothing would be done to him but a slap on the wrist
  For the most part my daughter has been open .. Her mom attends very few sessions I take her mostly every other weekend. Her mother has had her in councling before but has pulled both girls out once they get to know the councler and feel like there is some kind of a relationship. The councler has asked here mom to make the appointments every week instead of every other week but her mom refused untill I finaly put my foot down and made additional appointments .
  I think this answered your question thank you for your help...
• Mon, 22 Oct 2007 10:59:00 GMT(9)
• Please answer the other questions that were asked if you want any advice about your situation.
• Mon, 22 Oct 2007 11:52:00 GMT(10)

• Quote:

  Originally Posted by CJane

  I'm sorry, but your story just isn't ringing true.
  Your child comes to you and says she performed oral sex on another child... a child at least 5 years older than her and practically an adult... and CPS does NOTHING. AT. ALL.
  Your child tells you that she doesn't want her mother to know about it because she fears she'll be BEATEN UP. And CPS does NOTHING. AT. ALL.
  And NOW... she claims that she's given oral sex to a GROWN UP. And your first call is to your attorney?

  
  My first call was not to an attorney ... Not this time nor the first. My first call was to my daughters councler and then to CPS... In Washington CPS does nothing. Planin and simple I have gone round and round about this with them. They say its a cusdody matter.
  CPS had what they called a FAMILY get togehter so that we could bring issues like this together there solution was for my ex and I to attend mediation. .. 4 sessions scheduled and my ex only attened 1. A plan was put together and my ex refuses to follow it.
  That is why im asking for help on here.. I dont want the kids to go back into this situation at all. Im afraid for them and everything that this could lead to. not only the possibility of Diseases or pregnancy but what this is diong emotionlally to both of my daughters
• Mon, 22 Oct 2007 12:08:00 GMT(11)
• I'm curious about something...
  Is your daughter doing these things VOLUNTARILY?
  Are they being done in MOM'S HOUSE?
  Is she exhibiting OTHER sexually inappropriate behaviors?
  Has she been MOLESTED or is she ACTING OUT sexually?
  I realize she's only 11 and therefore cannot 'give' consent... but in a lot of areas and with a lot of kids, BJ's are the 'new French Kissing'. That is NOT to downplay this issue, but you're not giving 1/2 the information required and you don't really seem all that concerned about the ACT - only whether or not you retain custody.
• Mon, 22 Oct 2007 11:31:00 GMT(12)

• Quote:

  Originally Posted by mav8348

  Thanks for all who have replied.
  I do have the girls in therapy. Actually my 12 year old has been with a therapist for almost a year now. The "care team" is a group of individuals from diffrent agencies that get together to interview a child that has been abused like this. They only interview the child one time and one time only.
  As far as taking the child to the hospital under advisment of both my arrorney and CYS no I have not but depending on the outcome of the interview they will do that this week.
  Thank you again.

  Why in God's name did they tell you NOT to take the child to the hospital?
• Mon, 22 Oct 2007 11:42:00 GMT(13)
• I'm sorry, but your story just isn't ringing true.
  Your child comes to you and says she performed oral sex on another child... a child at least 5 years older than her and practically an adult... and CPS does NOTHING. AT. ALL.
  Your child tells you that she doesn't want her mother to know about it because she fears she'll be BEATEN UP. And CPS does NOTHING. AT. ALL.
  And NOW... she claims that she's given oral sex to a GROWN UP. And your first call is to your attorney?
• Mon, 22 Oct 2007 12:52:00 GMT(14)
• AGAIN! Hospital. STD tests. BIRTH CONTROL should also be gotten based on what you have added.
• Mon, 22 Oct 2007 13:04:00 GMT(15)
• This thread is just sad...11 and 12 year old girls that value themselves so little and parents that are clueless...
• Mon, 22 Oct 2007 11:50:00 GMT(16)

• Quote:

  Originally Posted by mav8348

  Your guess is as good as mine....

  Are you concerned with winning a lawsuit or acting in your daughter's best interest? If whta you say is true YOU NEED TO TAKE YOUR DAUGHTER TO THE HOSPITAL AND HAVE HER TESTED FOR STDS! Screw the courts and attorneys and CYS. Act FOR your child. Not for your attorney. Sorry but the child's HEALTH comes before a lawsuit.
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